America's Next Top Sir

I've been feeling reflective lately on just how to define my sexual identity.

There's no doubt in my mind that I am an aggressive, dominant partner. While this hasn't been how I've operated in relationships my entire life, it is assuredly where I identify right now. It has taken me a while to get to this point, and it has taken a great amount of self-analysis.

For a while, I struggled to reconcile this feeling of dominance with my attempts to further myself with the patriarchy. Let's face facts: I'm a white male in America. Without even contributing to a fucked system, I benefit from it. I want to benefit less from it, and I do try, but the fact of the matter is that I will. Probably for the rest of my life.

So as far as the term "Master" goes, I tend to shy away from it. It carries a sort of connotation of ownership and superiority, and while my Lady and I do engage in a relationship similar to most Master/slave dynamics, I really don't like it. For people of color and for women, I feel like the term "Master" has a history that I'm just plain uncomfortable with.

"Dominant" is one that I dont mind, but it seems rather clinical. Dont get me wrong, I can be a clinical bastard when I want to be, but I feel like "dominant" means so many other things, so I shouldnt use it.

"Sir" is odd to me. I like it when it's used, which my Lady does often. It does carry a sort of air of authority, which ironically enough I dont mind.

The one that I struggle the most with is "Top." It's a term that the homosexual community pretty much invented, and I feel like if I use it I'm sort of stealing it. I've read other writers who have utilized the term in the S&M community, so I understand that I'm not the only one who likes to use it, but still. On the other hand, I like it the most as an identifier: It's concise, it has a bit of mystery to it, and it doesnt really have any kind of nasty patriarichal connotation.

There's of course the possibility that I dont need to worry about this too much. But self-analysis is an important fact of anyone's life, so long as they hope to be fulffilled.

Domestic Discipline, of a sort

Whenever I get back from the gym, my body generally shuts down the ability to be active for roughly two hours or so. It's not just that I'm out of shape, but I guess all the heavy weights I tend to lift just take the fight out of me.

But after that I'm hit with a burst of manic, blood-pumping energy, the type of which really allows me to get shit done.

So it was no surprise that the Lady and myself began to clean up the house, in earnest. We have a large amount of guests over every week, and though they do try, when the vodka and the high grade beer begin to flow, cleanliness isn't really on everyone's mind.

She became frustrated with the general state of things, and to ease her problems, I began to play with her...a rough spank here, a tug of the nipples there, and plenty of me smelling the nape of her neck ( a personal favorite for both of us ).

This got the desired effect, which for once wasn't just the act of lovemaking, but to calm her anger down to a minimum so we could finish the job. I've read of households where the submissive does all the cleaning and is punished if it isn't up to snuff. I suppose we're different, using punishment to spurn us to finish the housework we both started. When my hand and her left cheek were burning with sensation, it was a reminder that there could be more down the line, once we finished cleaning.

I'm sure it isnt the standard way of doing things, but then again nothing we seem to do is the standard way of doing things.

Lord Have Mercy

It was early on in our relationship when the topic of spanking came up. I had indulged in a couple of playful swats before this, mainly becuase she had ( and still has ) an amazing ass. So bubble-like, sticking out, wide and plump and firm.

So, as yound couples are wont to do, we began experimenting. One night, when settling in for bed, she decided to confess to me.

Lady: "I've got something to tell you."

Me: "Mm?"

Lady: "Two men hit on me today at work. Don't worry, I wasn't receptive to the idea, but I feel bad and figured I should tell you."

At this point, I have put my book down. I've lit a cigarette, staring to the ceiling with evil, dark thoughts running through my head. However, I still know I can play my cards right ( fairly easily ) and open some doors in the process.

Me: "And you feel guilty about this, I take it?"

Lady: "I feel like maybe I was sending some kinda unintentional signal. I feel bad about it."

Me: "Bad enough to allow me to punish you for it?"

What followed was a flurry of conversation. She, though reticent, was open to the idea, as pain had always kind of been a "thing" for her.

Without so much as a moment's pause, I had her on shoulders and knees, exposing all of her charms to me. I would be lying if I didn't have to restrain myself from digging in right then and there. I had to remind myself that this was for the purposes of punishment.

I was green, as they say. I'd always harbored a bit of a dominant and sadistic streak in my lovemaking, but I'd never unleashed it like this. Shakily, my hand spanked her bare ass, planting upon each cheek one excessively hard slap followed by two shorter ones. This continued for maybe 30 seconds before she begged off, and what I said next was shocking even to me.

Me: "You dont get to ask me to stop. You wanted me to punish you, and I'm not about to let you off lightly."

I swung for the proverbial fences on that last word, drawing out "lightly" to accentuate my hard smack, which was punctuated with her yelping. It was like I was possessed, another voice that was not mine erupting from deep in my belly. But I went with it. I spanked her until my hand couldn't stand it anymore. She was sobbing, but she was thanking me within that.

The Punishment concluded, I stole a taste. with the evidence of her arousal nearly matting my beard, I clutched her close in my arms and let my hands roam over her sore, fiery backside.

We made love better that evening than we ever had before.

We also never looked back.

Welcome

Hello and welcome, inaugural post, etc etc

I'm Erudite Hayseed, a southern gentleman and something of a sexual being. I'm hoping this blog can be a chronicling of various things--Spankings given to my Lady, general kinks and obsessions, the difficulties of D/s relationships not only in general but in the south as well. I hope to make it photo-heavy, actively updated, and all in all maybe somewhat arousing to both the genitals and mind.

I invite anyone who enjoys my work here to e-mail me for whatever reason. Comment, please. Become part of this bizarre web of kink-related websites and blogs--I promise you wont be disappointed.